Douchebags Anonymous

Winning Harder: A Common List-Building Trap

2012-01-06T14:13:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a bit of a longer post, but I hope you can bear with me on it, as I feel there is an important lesson to be learned.

Winning Harder is the concept where you specifically choose things to add to your list that make your easier match-ups even easier. Either they are elements added that work well against inexperienced players playing any list, or against anyone playing an unbalanced list. Now, this might not seem novel at all, but there is absolutely no reason to increase your chances against these opponents as stronger play will carry the game for you anyway. I think a lot of people fall into this trap, with units that are commonly referred to as 'Death Stars' (much of you strength and points limited to one or a handful of hard to defeat units). Meanwhile, you have unbalanced your list so much that you will have issues against an opponent running something more balanced and with the experience to back it up.

The Land Raider: N00b Hammer. One of the most classic examples of Winning Harder.

I am going to start with an example of a list one of my friends was running at the local GW. He was playing occasionally on the intro nights where you bring in 1000 points and generally play against new players. As he played, he kept adding to and changing elements of list such that he could win his games faster and faster, and to that end he was succeeding. I had been taking a rather long break from the game at the time and was just coming back and people were raving about his list. My response, after hearing what was in it, was, 'That just sounds really bad.' Now, those who heard me say that rolled their eyes, this list had been utterly unstoppable. Before I go on a bit, let me show you the list and maybe get you thinking about why this thing was bad:

The N00b Hammer (1k Blood Angels)
Mephiston 250

Librarian Dread w/ Blood Lance, Shield of Sanguinius, Drop Pod 210

5x Death Company 100
Death Company Dread w/ Blood Talons 125

Baal Predator w/ Flame Storm Cannon 115

Storm Raven w/ Multi-Melta, Twin-Linked Lascannon 200
Total: 1000 points

Well, what are your thoughts?

Yes, you read it correctly, eleven models in total. Basically, when we met for a game to settle my 'arrogance', I brought the following:

Something a Little More Solid (1k Imperial Guard)
CCS w/ 3x Meltagun, Astropath, Chimera 165

Veterans w/ 3x Meltagun, Chimera 155

Platoon (415):
PCS w/ 3x Meltagun, Captain Al'Rahem, Chimera 185
Squad w/ Meltagun, Chimera 115
Squad w/ Meltagun, Chimera 115

Vendetta 130
Vendetta 130
Total: 995 points

Now, while a little gimmicky to be sure (deploy the Infantry Squads in the Vendettas, reserve them with Al'Rahem, they all come in together), I think you can agree that this list was not 'tailored' to beat those Blood Angels. It was simply a far more solid list.

What resulted was a tabling in about three turns (Al'Rahem showing up Turn 2). Because he focused so much on individually strong elements, he was completely unprepared to come close to defeating something with threats spread out across many targets. Further to that, he had no elements that worked together, such as a fire base supporting forward assault elements. I think at the end he had managed to immobilize one of the Chimeras.

An Example of Applying this concept

So, I have started working on a Blood Angels list at 1500 points. After going through some reading and looking at concept builds online, I had come up with this:

A First Attempt (1.5k Blood Angels)
Librarian w/ Jump Pack, Shield of Sanguinius, Unleash Rage 125

2x Sanguinary Priests w/ Jump Packs, Lightning Claws, Melta Bombs 190

10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw, Melta Bomb 230
10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw, Melta Bomb 230
10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw, Melta Bomb 230

Attack Bike w/ Multi-Melta 50
Attack Bike w/ Multi-Melta 50

5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
Total: 1495 points

I liked the Lightning Claws over Power Weapons because the claws perform the same against T4, but give me more options against higher. I do not need more advantages against lower Toughness anyway (so I am applying the concept a bit here).

***STOP SCROLLING HERE, LOOK AT WHY THIS IS NOT IDEAL***
(Feel Free to keep going though if you have no clue how Blood Angels work)

So, the biggest issue in my mind is having Special Weapons on the Sanguinary Priests. While they are an effective use of a WS5, a canny opponent will target them if they are placed into combat to attempt to negate your Feel No Pain. Against the type of player that will not perform this, you do not need additional advantages anyway. With those dropped, we can see if we can move some things around to spread out the effectiveness of this list a little:

Douche Angels (1.5k Blood Angels)
Librarian w/ Jump Pack, Shield of Sanguinius, Unleash Rage 125

2x Sanguinary Priests w/ Jump Packs 150

10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw, Melta Bomb 230
10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw, Melta Bomb 230
10x Assault Squad w/ 2x Meltagun, Lightning Claw 225

Attack Bike w/ Multi-Melta 50
Attack Bike w/ Multi-Melta 50
Attack Bike w/ Multi-Melta 50

5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
5x Devastators w/ 4x Missile Launchers 130
Total: 1500 points

So, I have removed any combat incentives for the Sanguinary Priests as I intend to use my movement to avoid bringing them into combat, and by dropping one of my Melta Bombs I was able to get another Multi-Melta into the list. This is a subtle change, to be sure, but something that makes the list a better contender. In either list, and more so in this second one, I would have issues with Dreadnoughts in Close Combat. This being known however, I can use that knowledge and superior movement and shooting to avoid that situation from manifesting iteself.

Countless examples can be made and lists cleaned up using this principle and I could extend this post much longer. Still, I hope I have brought to light some examples of how putting your army together can be one with a little more though and hopefully, knowing this trap will help you to avoid similar mistakes.

TL;DR: You should not bring units in your army that are good against bad players or bad lists because you should be able to outplay them anyway. Plan for the toughest opponents and you will be ready.

Starting a Warmachine League

2012-01-04T08:52:00.000-07:00

A pretty ambitious Warmachine/Hordes league is starting up here locally, with games spanning over an entire year. We start at 25 points and move up 5 points every two months. They seem to have found a balance with how to handle the games as your 'score' is based on your win/loss ratio for the month. I have been disappointed in the past with some people gaming a league to max out their games when others cannot; not necessarily leading to the better players getting up to the top.

This is being hosted at the best gamestore in town, Thunderground Comics, if you are in the area, it is definitely worth checking out. Probably the best Privateer Press selection in town and Roy Kim, the owner, always bends over backward to help out the community hosting large events.

So, what will I be bringing? My Cryx (which will be shockingly under-represented by just myself). Here are the lists I am looking at with a little explanation of their playstyle:

Lich Lord Asphyxious (AKA Epic Asphyxious (AKA eGaspy))

This guy promoted himself by turning his old boss into his new weapon.

Lich Lord Asphyxious (*6pts)
* Nightwretch (4pts)
Bane Knights (Leader and 9 Grunts) (10pts)
Bane Thralls (Leader and 5 Grunts) (5pts)
* Bane Thrall Officer & Standard (3pts)
Bane Lord Tartarus (4pts)
General Gerlak Slaughterborn (3pts)

Pretty standard really. You have to get in your Bane Thralls unit attachment, Tartarus, and access to about 8 more Bane Knights. With this, his feat move is full powered allowing a pretty impressive launching of up to ten previously killed models at the opponent for one turn. Nightwretch is along to give his spells a little range and to keep him in safety, and Gerlak joins the team as a sweeper for screening infantry if this is needed. This is primarily my 'anti-Hordes' list as the 19 Weapons Masters tend to make short work of warbeasts (which is usually hard to do when they outnumber your warjacks).

Skarre, Queen of the Broken Coast (AKA eSkarre)

Still the best Warcaster in the game

Skarre, Queen of the Broken Coast (*6pts)
* Defiler (5pts)
* Deathjack (12pts)
* Seether (9pts)
* Skarlock Thrall (2pts)
Pistol Wraith (3pts)

This list is something I have 'teched' out for this points limit and style of league. Skarre has an ability called Seas of Fate which basically grants Future Sight (can choose to boost after initial roll) to her entire battlegroup. This makes her and her warjacks extremely efficient. Since it is costly, I included two heavies that produce their own Focus. Between her and her Skarlock, Perdition will be used heavily to slingshot Deathjack forward. The Pistol Wraith is there to take advantage of her Black Spot spell, along with a fantastic ability to Solo hunt, because I figure a lot of players will be including very few but clutch Solos in their lists. Oh, and her feat lets her stop all targeting on up to five friendly models for a turn; kind of nice when you can cover nearly your whole army in a bubble.

I plan to write some more in depth articles about how this Warcasters work, especially at 50 points, at a later date.

Anyone want to weigh in on how these lists could be done better?

NOVA Open 2012 Tickets Are Released!

2011-12-01T22:56:00.001-07:00

Tickets sales have begun today, get them while you can:

NOVA Open website

Event Flyer

If you have ever thought about traveling to go to a tournament, this is the one to go to. The most competitive tournament being run with more prizes and support on their 'hobby track' than you will find in any 'fluffy' event.

Turns out we can all just get along and play Warhams...

Night Fight, Scarab Swarm

2011-11-29T16:40:00.001-07:00

Alright, I have been thinking a lot about how Necrons could work non-mech, and I think I have come to a conclusion, basically you need one important element: nearly endless night fight. To ensure maximum doucheyness, be sure to max out on slots of Spyders and Scarabs. Oh, and cheat at 'going foot' by bringing along Command Barges.

I typed 'arachnaphobia', this seemed good enough

Imotekh w/ Command Barge 295
2x Destruction Crypteks (one Solar Pulse) 90
Overlord w/ Warsythe, Tachyon Arrow, Command Barge 210
2x Destruction Crypteks (one Solar Pulse) 90

5x Warriors 65
5x Warriors 65
5x Warriors 65
5x Warriors 65
10x Immortals w/ Tesla Carbines 170
10x Immortals w/ Tesla Carbines 170

6x Scarabs 90
6x Scarabs 90
5x Scarabs 75

3x Spyders 150
3x Spyders 150
3x Spyders 150

Total: 1990

Alternatively, you could drop Imotekh's Command Barge, add two Crypteks of Destruction and a Scarab base to the unit of five.

Solar Pulse Crypteks join the Immortals for protection because you need them to survive. Be sure, with your scoring units to keep in mind how fragile they are, and deploy them (not all of them) appropriately (in cover/LOS blocked).

So, you can dependably have about 4 turns a game where your opponent has to deal with night fight. Ignoring my previous post (assuming their thing gets FAQed), you simply set up your attacks normally: generating 9 bases a turn. Use the Night Fight to set things up for your Scarabs to manoeuvre with their fleet moves and charges. Remember that Entropic Strike occurs after hits but before rolls to penetrate.

On top of this, you have a couple Command Barges that can set up for some nice drive-bys after those scarabs hit, and any Spyders reaching their deployment zone end game are going to be quite powerful.

What do you think, can Necrons work on foot?

Scarabs Are Stupid? Actually, Just the Editors Are...

2011-11-09T18:05:00.003-07:00

There is an issue with Canoptek Spyders in the new Necrons book, specifically how poorly edited some rules make it out of the gates. As an avid Warmachine player, I tend to notice these things pretty quickly, but I am sure others might have had inklings about this also. Check out my scenario which allows first turn charges with a significant amount of scarabs. Combine that with Imotekh's seize on 4+ rules and this is something that can be done more often than not.

It all comes down to the Scarab Hive rule in their entry:

Nominate a Canoptek Scarab unit within 6" and roll a D6. On a roll of 2-6, add one base to the Canoptek Scarab unit - the base can move an act normally this turn.

There is however no limit, currently, for where to place that new base, observe:

Start of turn, you have your Scarab swarm and three units of Spyders.

Place your first three bases.

Now the next three.

And the final set.


6" Move forward

...and Assault 12".

Some quick math shows 8 bases crossing the deployment zone, with five attacks each that auto hit and with half having the Entropic effect, you will have 20 reduced armour points right there. With the amount of your move, you have plenty of opportunity to multi-charge a number of units, all for the low cost of 495 points. Oh, and you have the rest of their army to contend with.

Now before you get up in arms about this, there is an important thing to keep in mind: this is not a player's fault. You may have an opinion on this, but someone else from a different background could have a completely different view. A player who plays lots of Warmachine, for example, would see this as purposeful design. Is it? We won't know until that FAQ comes out about six months from now.

Like any editorial, this needs to end with a 'call to arms': the solution is not to hassle people pointing this out, but to find a way to get in touch with the editors at GW and let them know that things like this are not okay, that rules have to come out clean and that a six month lag between release and FAQ is not acceptable... Unless this was done on purpose, in which case I will just shut up.

My First Crack at a Necrons List

2011-11-06T16:15:00.000-07:00

So, as many people also have, I picked up a copy of the Necrons codex this weekend and am looking through what kind of lists are available. So far, I have kind of settled on a specific build, but I am sure things will change in the coming weeks as the reality of a lot of these choices comes to the surface.

I will say this right off the bat: Necrons are frustrating to build lists with because it is just impossible to get everything you want into an army, with good choices appearing throughout the book. I happen think that is a good thing!

Be sure to ground yourself prior to assembly...

Imotekh and his Flying Douchebags
HQ: 650
Imotekh the Stormlord 225
Royal Court: 4x Cryptek of Destruction 140
Necron Overlord w/ Warscythe, Command Barge 180
Royal Court: 3x Cryptek of Destruction 105

Elites: 450
Triarch Stalker 150
Triarch Stalker 150
Triarch Stalker 150

Troops: 720
5x Warriors w/ Ghost Ark 180
5x Warriors w/ Ghost Ark 180
5x Warriors w/ Ghost Ark 180
5x Warriors w/ Ghost Ark 180

Heavy: 180
Annihilation Barge 90
Annihilation Barge 90

Total: 2000

So a little explanation, I suppose:

Well first, off, we have the rules for the Royal Courts, stating that only one member can be placed in each unit, but, we can simply grab a Cryptek from each Court and put it into a warrior unit. This gives us a couple good 2x Str8 shots coming out of most of the Ghost Arks, with Imotekh grabbing a ride on the last with a single Cryptek.

Another cheeky little rule I noticed is that there is absolutely no need for Imotekh to be on the table in order to use his abilities, simply a requirement that he be in your army. It is always a good thing to have more tactical options available that you thought (heck, you can reserve your whole list and still lightning up the enemy for the number of turns it takes him to come on).

Next off, a little summary:
10x AV13/11 Vehicles
8x Twin-linked Str7 Tesla Arc Shots (Annihilation Barges)
7x Str8 shots (Crypteks)
Imotekh's Str8s of ~~Magic~~ Science Lightning, along with his decent one shot Str6 AP1 mini-jaws
Necron Overlord to strafe over harder vehicles to break (Str7 2d6 pen on vehicles when you fly over them)
3x Double Multi-melta (Stalkers)

What we see is an army that will present a really tough nut to crack and frustrate a lot of armies. I am obviously going to have to proxy up the Triarch Stalkers for the time being, but I really think they are an essential part to making this work.

If Imotekh was not so crazy good for a mech army, I would definitely have put in two Overlords on Barges and an 8th Cryptek in there, but alas, this special character looks worth his points.

Damn you Imotekh for being so awesome and eating up all my vehicle points...

Onslaught 2011 List (Take 2!)

2011-10-08T13:27:00.000-06:00

So, while the painting is coming along great, I may have been off more than I can chew. I could still complete the original list, but would be painting right up to the tournament and I want to be done well in advance. Here is what I am looking at running instead:

Semi-Mech Imperial Guard
CCS w/ 2x Meltagun, Regimental Standard, Chimera 140
CCS w/ 2x Meltagun, Regimental Standard, Chimera 140

Platoon (625)
PCS w/ 3x Meltagun, Chimera 115
Infantry Squad w/ Autocannon, Chimera 115
Infantry Squad w/ Autocannon, Chimera 115
SWS w/ 3x Meltagun 65
SWS w/ 3x Meltagun 65
HWS w/ 3x Autocannon 75
HWS w/ 3x Autocannon 75

Platoon (625)
PCS w/ 3x Meltagun, Chimera 115
Infantry Squad w/ Autocannon, Chimera 115
Infantry Squad w/ Autocannon, Chimera 115
SWS w/ 3x Meltagun 65
SWS w/ 3x Meltagun 65
HWS w/ 3x Autocannon 75
HWS w/ 3x Autocannon 75

Leman Russ Executioner w/ Plasma Sponsons 230
Leman Russ Executioner w/ Plasma Sponsons 230
Total: 1990 (The last ten points are kind of trivial, probably just Frag Grenades for the CCS)

Sample Deployment:

One of many deployment options

Discussion

This gives me a solid base of shooting with a great ability to bubble-wrap my important units with the Infantry Squads. I posted this on some forums, and I guess it's not clear: The SWS units will take the transports from the Infantry Squads (people were seriously telling me that SWS on foot are bad, and that Autocannons in Chimeras are not great because they cannot move as list advice, lol). The Squads can either combine or not, obviously my deployment will depend a lot on the type of list I am facing. I think it can be seen from the picture that I have a lot of room in my deployment zone to deny outflanking if necessary also.

AV14 is a complete pain-in-the-ass to kill at range, and I intend to use that to my advantage. There are some nice AV12 options for shooting in the IG codex, but they are also more readily shaken/stunned and can be made irrelevant the entire game.

Some quick totals:
8x Chimera
6x Mobile scoring units
6-8x Deployment zone scoring units
22x Meltaguns
16x Autocannons
8-10x Plasma Cannons (depending on movement)

Considering my local tournaments are extremely Marine heavy and my biggest issue is killing Jump Blood Angels (with FNP), I think I can get that match-up very locked down.

Thoughts?

Imperial Guard vs Imperial Guard (Vassal Battle Report)

2011-09-29T21:58:00.000-06:00

Well, the Vassal40k league is carrying on with my list testing continuing. My next opponent is playing Imperial Guard.We roll up three objectives with a Dawn of War deployment, and he gets to pick sides. Here's what he brought:

HQ:
Company Command Squad, Regimental Standard, 2 Meltaguns, 1 Flamer, Chimera, (Hull Heavy Bolter)-145

Troops:
Platoon Command Squad, 2 Meltaguns, 2 Flamers, Chimera, (Hull Heavy Bolter)-115
-Infantry Squad, Sergeants Powersword, Commisar, Commisars Powersword-105
-Infantry Squad, Sergeants Powersword-60
-Infantry Squad, Sergeants Powersword-60
-Infantry Squad, Sergeants Powersword-60
-Heavy Weapons Squad, 3 Autocannon Teams-75
-Heavy Weapons Squad, 3 Autocannon Teams-75

10 Veterans, (6 Shotguns)2 Meltaguns, 1 Flamer, Chimera, (Hull Heavy Flamer)Dozer Blade-160
10 Veterans, (6 Shotguns)2 Meltaguns, 1 Flamer, Chimera, (Hull Heavy Flamer)Dozer Blade-160
10 Veterans, (6 Shotguns)2 Meltaguns, 1 Flamer, Chimera, (Hull Heavy Flamer)Dozer Blade-160

Fast Attack:
Devil Dog, (Hull Heavy Flamer)Extra Armor, Dozer Blade, Smoke Launchers-150
Devil Dog, (Hull Heavy Flamer)Extra Armor, Dozer Blade, Smoke Launchers-150

Heavy Support:
2 Hydra Flak Tanks, (Hull Heavy Bolters)-150
2 Hydra Flak Tanks, (Hull Heavy Bolters)-150
3 Griffon Heavy Mortars, (Hull Heavy Flamers)-225
Total: 2000 pts

Initial Thoughts:
This army is really scattered and hasn't decided what it is trying to accomplish. I notice the Squads have no Meltas, so they can literally be ignored for the whole game unless he starts aggressively moving them in (in which case they will have to deal with Heavy Flamers). The Griffons are of little concern to my vehicles, leaving very few sources of damage that will legitimately scare me. So few Heavy Weapons Teams mean it will be a simple task to remove this threat through Multi-Laser fire (which instant kills). His Veterans all opted to lose a Meltagun for a Flamer, which does allow them to be more of a dual threat, but I tend to think that the vehicle Heavy Flamers are plenty, lending the embarked unit better anti-tank reliability. Well, time to play on and see what I can learn from this.

Deployment

For this game, we elected to play the central building as Impassable Terrain that completely blocked LOS. I was immediately shocked that he chose the bottom side of the table, considering the placement of the objectives. This would make a game really hard to take away from an opponent deciding to bunker up. He deployed his combined squad of Infantry, a Heavy Weapons Squad and his HQ Chimera (with the unit inside, which is technically not allowed but I didn't notice until later). For simplicity's sake, I kept my army off the table to come on turn one, along with the Stormtroopers using their Deep Strike mission.

His Turn 1

At this point, I elect not to try to seize. He moves on all his units and that's that.

My Turn 1

I move my army on in a split, popping smoke where it is relevant (no night fight next turn). I bring my Hydras in on the right side planning to bring in the Stormtroopers to deal with his, giving me distinct shooting superiority on that side of the board. On the left, I bring in my Sentinels hoping to lock the giant Squad into combat for the entire game. If that doesn't work, my vehicle Flamers should be able to break through.

His Turn 2

Not too much going on over here, I lose a Sentinel to some shooting, along with the Platoon Command Squad Chimera on the right, with his Griffons clearing out the troops. Not too shabby. He leaves his large Squad in place to guard against Stormtroopers getting to his vehicles.

My Turn 2

My Stormtroopers get a unit in and wreck one of the two Hydras on the bottom right. My focus on the right is to take out those Meltas as soon as I can, and I manage to wreck his Veteran's ride, forcing them out. On the left side, I am determined to place my units on the Objective and behind the partial cover of the fence so that even if I am Immobilized, I can guard the Objective. The others only advance 6" so that they can put their Multi-lasers onto the Heavy Weapons teams, getting a wound on each, with one leaving the table.

His Turn 3

Well, he pays me back a bit, but already he is running out of steam. The forward Chimera takes all the shooting leaving a pile of blood in it's wake (this will be a pattern, anything that disembarks immediately dies). On the right, he moves a Devil Dog that lost it's weapon last turn onto the Objective to try to block it off, but forgot to smoke it.

My Turn 3

I keep my aggressive advance forward, and am going to depend on holding the centre of the table to be my path to victory. In the top right, one of my Chimeras immobilizes itself on terrain. I keep the squad in for later, knowing that if it disembarks, it will die. On the right I do one of my favourite moves with a Chimera, an under 6" ram to his Chimera. What this does is, while I lose the ability to shoot with my vehicle, I get to block them into place quite well along with still being able to shoot with my Meltagun payload. I destroy his Platoon Command Vehicle and wreck the blocking Devil Dog. On the left, I do nothing basically, as all the Multi-Lasers bounce off the cover saves of the Heavy Weapons Squad.

His Turn 4

This is where my opponent stated later that he began to see the issues with picking the side he did on deployment. He tries to move in as best he can to take down my army with Meltas, but achieves nothing but some Immobilized results (the big Hexagons on the backs of some of my vehicles). On the left, his Chimera rams forward 5" and the squad inside gets some Meltas in. I see he likes my manoeuvre and is already incorporating it into his play. In the top left, the second Sentinel finally dies.

My Turn 4

Nothing more to do than to continue my push forward. A couple vehicles die as I take more aggressive positions in the front. I know that I have that rear objective locked down, so worst case, all I need to do is contest the other two to get the win. A left Chimera dies to superior Melta fire (I had three compared to his two), and I finally get his Heavy Weapons Squad to fail some saves. He now only has two units that can threaten my vehicles on that side (Meltas in the Chimera and the Hydras), very much limiting his options to push me back. The Stormtroopers finally arrive and manage to knock a weapon off the Hydra, which is good enough.
I realize from my notes that the front Chimera I smoked on the right had already done it previously and turn it off before his shooting starts, but at this point he has lost a lot of his ability to really do any damage whatsoever.

His Turn 5

Well, it's turn 5 and the game can end. He finally starts aggressively pushing forward with his troops on the left to take the objective. He shakes the closest Chimera, meaning it is going to push forward. In the worst case, I would have sacrificed a unit just to contest this. On the right he moves up to cover the objective with his Devil Dog, and gets the Vets just barely able to take it. I lose four of my Stormtroopers and choose to keep the Sergeant alive, hoping he has the best chance to not break, and hoping he will be in range of the Veterans to possibly force them off the objective through an assault.

My Turn 5

On the left, I simply get two vehicles in to make it extremely hard to remove them from play, on the right, I am able to ram into and destroy the Devil Dog with my Vets, and everyone's shooting nearly wipes out the Veterans. He elects to take the ones from those models out of cover meaning I now control the objective.

He rolls to continue and the game ends with me controlling two Objectives to his zero.

Concluding Thoughts
Well... it was not exactly a stressful game, but I was able to pull some good lessons out of this. Clearly choosing to be away from the objectives was a blunder, especially against an army that can bunker down if it needs to. I see my own list's ability to really dig in and hold things also. On the flip side of this, were he playing an extremely aggressive army instead of a gun, he would have picked the correct side as the majority of his units would be near to my deployment zone.

On the deployment front, I think the split he did was a bad idea, and he could have instead spread the Infantry Squad out more so that more than half were still in cover but all his vehicles would be behind them. If all his Chimeras came in near to that big pile or centrally (denying me a flank), I would have had to have responded in turn with many of my units on that side. He could then have made a break behind the building with all of his Chimeras, coming around the right side in force and possibly flanking me.

I am getting more comfortable constantly going second in these games, and am seeing this list's ability to deploy everything and still take that first turn's beating in exchange for being able to react to a deployment, and am going to keep that in mind for Dawn of War and Pitched Battle deployments in the future.

Imperial Guard vs Grey Knights (Vassal Battle Report)

2011-09-25T00:29:00.001-06:00

Continuing on with my online Vassal40k league to practice with my army, my next opponent was a Grey Knights player. We rolled up a map from the map pool, and ended up with Five Objectives with Spearhead deployment. I elected to go second here to reduce surprise objective grabs (and maybe make some of my own). His list:

-HQ-
Librarian - Warding Staff (215)
-Might of Titan, Shrouding, Sanctuary, Quicksilver, The Summoning, Warp Rift

-Elites-
5x Paladins - Brotherhood Banner, 1x MC Hammer, 1x MC Halberd (390)
-1x Master Crafted Warding Stave + Master Crafted Psycannon, 1x Master Crafted Sword + Master Crafted Psycannon

-Troops-
5x Strikers - 1x Halberd (Justicar), 1x Psycannon (165)
-Razorback - Twin- Linked Heavy Bolter - Pysbolt Ammunition

5x Strikers - 1x Halberd (Justicar), 1x Psycannon (165)
-Razorback - Twin- Linked Heavy Bolter - Pysbolt Ammunition

5x Strikers - 1x Halberd (Justicar), 1x Psycannon (165)
-Razorback - Twin- Linked Heavy Bolter - Pysbolt Ammunition

5x Strikers - 1x Halberd (Justicar), 1x Psycannon (165)
-Razorback - Twin- Linked Heavy Bolter - Pysbolt Ammunition

-Fast Attack-
Storm Raven - Twin- Linked Multi-Melta, Twin- Linked Plasma Cannon (205)

-Heavy Support-
6x Purgators - 4x Psycannons (260)
-Razorback - Twin-Linked Heavy Bolter - Psybolt Ammunition, Hunter-killer Missile

Dreadnought - 2x Twin-linked Auto-cannons, Psybolt Ammo (135)
Dreadnought - 2x Twin-linked Auto-cannons, Psybolt Ammo (135)
Total: 2000 pts

Initial Impressions:
Well, there are three things that stick out at me when I see this list:
1) He has a Stormraven and tooled out Paladins squad, I need a solution for stopping them.
2) He only has 20 total scoring models in his list, all of which die to the same things that kill marines.
3) He spent way too many points on his HQ, Elites and Fast Attack combo.

Deployment

The objectives are pretty much symmetrical. He basically deploys on the line and places all his Paladins, his Librarian and one Dreadnought on the Stormraven. I take my two Infantry Squads and deploy them in front to hold up the Paladins for a turn. Their empty transports will be taken by the Special Weapons Squads. I elect to Outflank my Stormtroopers due to Warpquake probably ruining my day.

GK Turn 1

He moves many of his units aggressively forward. Good move, considering their short range. The Stormraven moves in on the top dropping his Dreadnought on the way. His Multimelta only managed a Stun on one of my Chimeras. On the left, his Squads easily wipe out my Infantry Squad which flees (and leaves the table at the start of my turn) while his Dreadnought explodes my Hydra. Behind the building, his Purgation Squad sets up to be a nuisance for the rest of the game. He leaves one Squad back to babysit an objective.

IG Turn 1

Umm... not much to report here. I felt really slick when I noticed I could surround his Stormraven with my Infantry Squad. Their first 6" gets them a good amount around it, but my Run, Run, Run! order fails. Their own run of 2" kind of dashes my hopes of accomplishing anything. He casts Shrouding on his Stormraven, giving it a 3+ cover save. I still try giving his Stormraven what for and maybe pinning the squad and manage one Shaken, which he removes his next turn. On the bottom, I move in to the lower zone, blocking it off with a forward Chimera. Everything follows behind. I didn't manage to do anything down here. So that's an entire 1st turn shooting barrage resulting in one shaken result. Oh, and two of my Chimeras immobilize themselves. Go Guard!

GK Turn 2

Oh... Em... Gee... So things start looking rough for me at this point. My top Platoon Command Squad Chimera explodes and the squad takes some shooting but holds. A bit to the left, my last Hydra is also reduced to a crater. The top Special Weapons Squad loses their ride to a wreck. My charge-eating Infantry Squad doesn't manage to do their job, having disappeared in the shooting phase. At least that limits his forward movement! On the bottom, the other Platoon Command Squad has a wrecked ride and the forward Chimera is stunned and immobilized. Things are starting to look bleak...

IG Turn 2

Revenge time! Okay, not really... let's go with Survival time! I try two tank shocks on his Grey Knight Squads and they both hold, taking a few wounds to some shooting. Up top, I start trying to layer threats to slow down the Paladins (even if it is a single Melta). Everyone fails to receive orders to improve their threat against the Paladins. Time for slick manoevre #2 (this one actually works): assaulting with Sentinels. 6s to hit with grenades, one attack each, and 6s to glance mean these combats are going to go on a while. There we go, half of his scoring units tied up. I generally try to spread some wounds around to force morale checks, but to no avail. Both my Stormtroopers come in on my side of choice and work on taking out his troops sitting on an objective. They manage to wreck the vehicle and the squad hides behind the inferno.

GK Turn 3

Alright, more carnage courtesy of the Grey Knights. The two tankshocking Chimeras get immobilized and wrecked respectively, as is my forward Chimera on the bottom. His Stormraven moves into place along with his lower Dreadnought to punish my Stormtroopers. Between the two, the Stormraven does nothing and the Dreanought stuns the lower one. The Purgation squad joins in, but I save their single penetrating hit. Shockingly, nothing happens in either Sentinel combat.

IG Turn 3

So, time to start thinking about the mission a little more. I smoke the damaged Stormtroopers Chimera and move up with the other managing some shooting on the hiding Strike Squad. The Multi-laser on the top manages two wounds on the Purgation Squad but they hold. I move my top Company Command Squad Chimera in an effort to block off access to my objective; I will have to figure out how to actually take it when the time comes. On the bottom, my Platoon Command Squad starts moving in order to start threating those Razorbacks that can tank shock a lot of my troops and possibly contest later. They find it was a useless trip because some lucky shooting ended up dropping both those vehicles. I manage to wipe out his Strike Squad on the large building, bringing him down to three scoring units. His two Razorback at the top both lose their guns to some shooting. At the very top centre, a lone Meltagunner moves in to block the Paladins' movement and meet his fate.

GK Turn 4

Jumped the gun a little and moved an Infantry Squad at the top of the building before taking the screen shot, ignore them. Well, his Razorbacks without weapons got turned into tankshocking machines and that is just what they did. His Librarian leaves his squad to make room for this tank shock. My lone Meltagunner on the top runs, but his job is now being done by the Razorback placed in the way. The other one gets Death or Gloried into an immobilized result. To the right, his Stormraven stuns and immobilizes the top Chimera. He finally gets ticked off about the lack of results in the Sentinel combats and stacks two psychic powers on the top Strike Squad. Str5 with 2d6 pen does manage to explode the Sentinel, taking a couple with it. I start getting a good feeling because it really seems like he has run out of steam at this point.

IG Turn 4

All the Stormtroopers disembark. The top one fails to hurt the Stormraven while the lower group wipes out the Strike Squad. In the centre, I wreck both his vehicles after hiding my Infantry Squad behind the wreck, hopefully forcing a couple Dangerous Terrain checks on anything that tries to assault. On the left, my Platoon Command Squad gets back on their objective.

GK Turn 5

His Stormraven launches two Frag missiles (both missed) and a Plasma Cannon into the central group of guys. I take some wounds but both squads hold. The Strike Squad gets into it with my Infantry Squad, but they also kill one back resulting in losing by two, and they stay in. His Purgation Squad moves itself into cover, rightly afraid of the coming Stormtroopers and fire a volley into the close squad, killing three. He tries ramming my top Chimera but does nothing and the Librarian comes in to wreck it, forcing the Command Squad out.

Alright, if the game ends right here, I have it, but I have to plan for future turns just in case. I have to start taking down the things that can come in to contest objectives. On the left, the Platoon Command Squad moves off their objective to join the assault against the lone guy fighting my Sentinel. While they did avoid the vehicle on their move, their assault claims two models (including the Commander, which I thought had two wounds). They flee due to their losses despite having been able to reach the combat. My worry was the lone guy finally winning combat and consolidating to contest the objective.

Rules break: Was that done properly, or do they eat the wounds and that then counts toward the combat result?

For this reason, I disembarked my Veterans and spread them out to make a wall to block his model from sneaking to the objective without a dangerous terrain check. I manage immobilized results on his top Razorback and Stormraven stopping their ability to contest later in the game. The Chimeras on the right put one more wound onto the Purgation Squad and they finally run. I finally kill the lone Librarian who could have come in to threaten objectives. The combats both end up continuing finishing up the turn, and a roll of a 2 ends the game.

Results: IG: 3, GK: 0

Concluding Thoughts
A lot of people complain about the Grey Knights, but they have a rough time with a lot of match-ups, and if you choose not to play them on their terms. Take advantage of the fact that they lack reliable anti-vehicle weaponry (if they elect not to bring Minions) and have limited range. One of their biggest issues is the cost of their toys, leaving them with few targets that actually have to be destroyed. I think this is a great example to illustrate why those big toys tend to come up short. That Stormraven survived the turn that I wanted it dead, so I just forgot about it until the end when I had dealt with the other things. What did it accomplish during the game? A couple vehicle results (nothing destroyed) and not much else. Just imagine if I instead had to deal with more Strike Squads instead of that plane and the Paladins; it would have definitely resulted in something different.

The Sentinels were definitely the MVPs of this game, locking down half his scoring units for most of the game. Do not be afraid to get your shooting Dreanoughts into combat if you can take the hit to your shooting, it is specifically why I have brought them in my list.

I was definitely disheartened by my second turn, having done nothing and getting a good part of my army destroyed. Do not quit! I admit, I was thinking of doing exactly that. Push through and see what you can make of the game. Some casual observers to our game were checking in occasionally and were shocked that it resulted in an IG win as they had only seen the first couple turns. Very worst case: you get some good practice in.

Speedpainting Storm Troopers

2011-09-21T16:07:00.002-06:00

Here we go, a quick step-by-step of how I painted my Stormtroopers. I decided to knock these guys off early in my painting because they have more details than any other models in the list. First off, the finished product:

Ready to melta

Now then, on to the guide:

Step 1: Basecoat

Get some Iyandan Yellow into an airbrush and coat everything.

Step 2: Bases (I really need a lighting kit...)

Wash the base with a 50:50 watered down Devlan Mud. Drybrush with Dheneb Stone, then rim the thing with something dark to make things show up better (Scorched Brown used here). Always avoid rimming with black if you can, it actually takes away from the rest of the colour!

Step 3: Base Colours

Now to do the base colours. I did a 50:50 mix of Iyandan Yellow and Vermin Brown to do all the leather parts. The backpacks are full Vermin Brown. Metal Detail is all Boltgun Metal and the guns are Scab Red. Feel free to toss in some high-contrast highlights at this point before you move on. The model will now look horrible, but keep your painting neat and have faith.

Step 4: Washes (AKA Cheating)

Alright, now take everything that is yellow and leather and paint on Gryphonne Sepia. The backpack, weapon and metal are all washed with Devlan Mud. When the Sepia has dried, do another coat of Ogryn Flesh on the armoured plates. Some black wash was used on the tips of the Meltaguns. Congratulations, you now have tabletop quality models.

Step 5: Details (Feel Free to Skip This)

Finally, I decided to do some quick detail work. Buttons and visors were quickly painted with Hawk Turquoise and highlighted with Ice Blue. The Melta powerpacks were painted Blazing Orange. A quick Blazing Orange wash was made using a whole bunch of Tamya X-20A Acrylic Thinner and a tiny bit of the orange and applied around the energy circle or whatever it is. This was then highlighted Sunburst Yellow and then a little White.

Well, that's pretty much it. A nice and easy paintjob that stands up to scrutiny up close and looks fantastic on the table. Now, onto the other 90-some models...

Imperial Guard vs Space Wolves (Vassal Battle Report)

2011-09-20T10:05:00.000-06:00

I joined an online Vassal40k league to get the chance to practice with my army while I am working on the massive painting project. My first match is against a Space Wolves player. We rolled up a map from the map pool, and ended up with Annihilation with Spearhead deployment. I won the roll and deployed first. His list:

HQ: 110
Rune Priest, Chooser of the Slain, Living Lightning, Jaws of the World Wolf (110)

ELITE: 285
Wolf Guards x5, Combi-meltagun x5, Power fist x3 (175)
Wolf Scouts x5, Meltagun, Melta bombs (110)

TROOPS: 900
Grey Hunters x8, Meltagun, Wolf Standard, Mark of the Wulfen, Rhino (185)
Grey Hunters x8, Meltagun, Wolf Standard, Mark of the Wulfen, Rhino (185)
Grey Hunters x5, Meltagun, Rhino (115)
Grey Hunters x5, Meltagun, Rhino (115)
Grey Hunters x5, Flamer, Razorback, Lascannon and twin-linked plasma gun (150)
Grey Hunters x5, Flamer, Razorback, Lascannon and twin-linked plasma gun (150)

FAST: 360
Thunderwolf Cavalry x3, Power Fist x1, Meltabombs x1 (180)
Thunderwolf Cavalry x3, Power Fist x1, Meltabombs x1 (180)

HEAVY: 345
Long Fangs x5, Squad Leader, Missile Launcher x4 (115)
Long Fangs x5, Squad Leader, Missile Launcher x4 (115)
Long Fangs x5, Squad Leader, Missile Launcher x4 (115)

TOTAL: 2000

Deployment

So... due to terrain I don't really have a whole lot special to do. Hydras on the flanks, and Infantry Chimeras go forward. Some token troops were out to represent the Special Weapon Squads taking the Stormtrooper Chimeras to save time; if he blows them up before I embark, I will place the rest. He has his longfangs out and in cover. I do not actually mind since all my weapons that will be shooting at them generally still allow him his 3+ saves anyway. Oh, and he seizes the initiative. Magical.

SW Turn 1

Not much happening here, he moves up a bit. His Longfangs manage to stun both Hydras and destroys one of the top Hydra's weapons, but that is about it. Pretty good considering I could not pop smoke yet.

IG Turn 1

I advance some Chimeras for some blocking and cover, manage to pop his forward Rhino. His Longfangs made a fantastic amount of saves and take only one wound (statistically I should be able to kill 6-7 a turn). I manage to immobilize two of my Chimeras on terrain. Doing his work for him...
Killpoints: IG: 1, SW: 0

SW Turn 2

Here, I should have been a little more rulesey as it comes back to bite me. His upper rhino tried to get into the centre ruin and immobilized itself. What I should have done is made sure that he rotated first before doing his move (as you cannot actually just shuffle sideways). His large Grey Hunters (with Rune Priest) disembark, move forward, pop the Chimera and assault, wiping out the troops. Had it rotated, he would not have been able to assault. He Stuns a couple chimeras with shooting. I forgot to remove the stuns from the Hydras, from this point forward no shooting is taken by them.
Killpoints: IG: 1, SW: 2

IG Turn 2

Both Stormtroopers come in and are still able to threaten the Longfangs despite scattering both times each. For some bizarre reason, four meltas and six rapid-firing hot shot lasguns manage one casualty. I am able to pop the front Rhino and then proceed to spread as many wounds as possible around his squads to force panic checks, but only the small Greyhunters in the top middle crater flee. I continue to bait with my forward Chimera on the bottom which continually soaks up all the fire.
Killpoints: IG: 2, SW: 2

SW Turn 3

So, on a roll of a 1, the Scouts come in on the right side and are able to charge both Stormtroopers. One Sergeant lives so when the other unit flees, it is not pursued. Unfortunately, the only go 5" forcing them to flee again on my turn. The Thunderwolves come in and do their thing. Only the ones with Powerfists actually manage results: Str 5 is a waste of time in combat vs AV10. The Greyhunters fail to melta the upper Chimera, but one Powerfist manages to come in and wreck it.
Killpoints: IG: 2, SW: 4

IG Turn 3

Time for some revenge. A couple tankshocks force both the Thunderwolves and Greyhunters to flee. I place my Command Squad and other Chimera such that I have units within 6" to force them off the board. On the bottom, the second Command Squad disembarks to pass two Fire on my Target! orders for the disembarked vets to shoot at the remaining Thunderwolves unit, putting one wound onto each. I thought that 'V' formation with my Chimeras was pretty slick (the second tried to tank shock the centre Grey Hunters and Thunderwolves, but they both held), preventing the Wolves from assaulting them. Unfortunately, his part of the assault finally wrecks the vehicle. I manage to wreck one of his Razorbacks. On the right, the Scouts finish eating the lone Stormtrooper and move on to the next Squad still fleeing. I send out an Infantry Squad to assault the Longfangs and silence them, but both sides do no wounds to each other.
Killpoints: IG: 3, SW: 6

SW Turn 4

Okay, this picture was taken slightly into my turn by accident. Both the fleeing Grey Hunters and Thunderwolves only move a couple inches. He manages a Jaws on the Command Squad but only the Commander actually dies to it, some bolters take out the meltaguns. He multi-assaults with the Wolves again, exploding a Chimera and putting 5 wounds on the remaining six Vets (the exploded vehicle also wiped out a good chunk of my army). I decide to leave my Sergeant alive as I figure they will still flee, but have the best chance to be rallied with orders. I roll a 3 and he stays in allowing the black squad to get away. This is bad, I wanted to wipe them out with shooting on my turn, but now he will get another assault in. He runs out with his Grey Hunters on the right and assaults my Infantry Squad, wiping them out. The Scouts eat the Stormtroopers and he consolidates them into line of sight blocking terrain. On the top, his Longfangs and other units rush over to hide behind his Razorback. 'Really?', I asked him, a little ticked off to have to play this kind of game. 'Yes,' he replies.
Killpoints: IG: 3, SW: 9

IG Turn 4

Okay, this turn I tank shock both those fleeing units off the board. I am kind of stuck with my shooting options here as the Thunderwolves stayed in combat. I order the black Vets to Get Back in the Fight! and some rear units reposition to get ready for the next turn. I don't manage to move the blue squad enough to block the Thunderwolves from multi-assaulting or even to save that unit, with a total move and run of 3". I destroy the last Razorback leaving a Wreck that his units can fully hide behind. Time to bring in the Special Weapons Squad cleanup crew! Shockingly, three Thunderwolf Cavalry manage to kill a single Imperial Guardsmen... He only consolidates 1", but they have plenty of move to do what they want. I try to position units so that he assaults in the way I want him to. The far right Chimera puts wounds on the Longfangs and Grey hunters, along with the help of some Multi-lasers and Autocannons, but both units hold. On the top, behind the building and on the right, six units hide completely out of Line of Sight and the rest sit in cover. Fun times.
*Important Note: I realize here, while writing this up, that my top Special Weapons Chimera just popped smoke for the second time, which neither of us realized. Kind of irrelevant considering nothing was shooting anyway, but I will need to make sure to get some kind of counters to use in games to remember this.
Killpoints: IG: 6, SW: 10

SW Turn 5

Not much to report here, units are mostly hiding. His two Greyhunters manage to get a fortuitous wreck on the right Chimera and hide themselves completely behind it, and the Thunderwolves pop a Chimera and wipe a Squad. His central Grey Hunters and long Longfang on the right start to run away. He runs his squad of two Grey Hunters into the hiding Rhino.
Killpoints: IG: 6, SW 13

IG Turn 5

Here we go, time to clean things up a bit. I disembark a whole bunch and wipe out the Thunderwolf Cavalry, which disappear leaving a few black scorch marks on the ground. My special Weapons move up and blow up a stranded Rhino and wipe a Squad of Grey Hunters. I wipe the unit of two Longfangs out. I don't manage to cause enough wounds on any other units to force any panic checks and even the bottom Hydra could not manage a kill on the lone Longfang.
Killpoints: IG: 10, SW: 13

On a roll of a 1, the game ends with the Wolves winning by three Kill Points.

Analysis: I am really not down about this game, I think it went quite well for my first playtest of my new list. I learned about how important it is to prioritize the Thunderwolves in future games (where there is not a big LOS blocking piece in the centre), as Longfangs are really fairly ineffective against AV12. I feel like I played the list well enough and was generally able to get him to shoot and assault what I wanted him to. Despite the loss, I am still feeling good about the army; it truly is a nightmare list to face. By the end he was completely on his back heels with every single unit either hiding or running to hide and I should have an easy finish in that scenario if the game were to continue. This is generally not a 'parking lot' army, but since I so effectively outshoot him and he has devastating (to vehicles) charges, I wanted to delay as much as possible that eventuality. I also think this solidly shows that despite having 30 total Killpoints, it does not really make Annihilation a bad scenario for me.

Discussion: Always open to opinions, how could I have deployed/played this better?

Forgeworld Are Assholes (How to Build the Hydra)

2011-09-15T20:53:00.001-06:00

I picked up two of the Forgeworld Hydra kits to make nicer versions of them than what I previously had (Aegis Gunline converted to get the job done), and after assembling the Chimera parts... I was not exactly elated about what I received:

Ezmode Building

WTF Garbage

Now... what the image above does not tell you is the hour I spent with two bowls of water (one hot, one cold) dipping pieces of resin in to make them soft, bending them into shape, then quickly dunking them in the cold water to set them. Oh, and within about 30 seconds, the freshly boiled water is no longer hot enough to soften it again. Someone mentioned trying a blowdryer, but there is a risk of bubbling the resin, so not happening. I would also suggest keeping away from your deep fryer.

Furthermore, those flat top hatch pieces were just... odd. I have no clue how two pieces coming out of the same mold could be so different. Different lengths and varying widths meant they were not good enough for what I just paid for. So, for the first time ever, I decided to try some 'hobbying' (I have never done this before, but it seems to mostly involve swearing at inanimate objects, which I picked up quickly). Enter Plasticard:

Cutting that hole in the centre is a bitch.

I used something called Sheet Styrene produced by Evergreen Scale Models (1mm thick, and with 1/8" squares marked on the rear which made for really easy cutting).

All done.

WTF, seriously?

So, one more piece of my plastic cleaned this whole thing up nicely, after knifing down those rivets to get a clean seal:

Doing Forgeworld's job for them.

Completed model.

Actually, in preparation for this I looked at a few entries people have posted about how to get this done and kind of combined the ones I thought looked best. Pretty simple steps, but I think it is one of the better ways to get this thing looking nice and clean. No greenstuff!

Imperial Guard Test Models

2011-09-14T21:57:00.001-06:00

Well, it is time to get working on a pretty ambitious painting project: 16 vehicles and 103 infantry in about six weeks. I have been working on a new scheme based a lot on the lessons I have learned from a great painting blog, so I should be able to speed paint the crap out of this stuff.

First off was preparing some test models to see how it will look and to work out my painting steps. Here's what I got so far:


My test models

Two Sentinels

Basic Meltagunner

Chimera

So, as you can see, it is basically a desert scheme. The base is a Iyandan Yellow with some Vermin Brown camo work all applied by airbrush. I will do some work in progress for my future batch painting showing the steps, as I am sure someone out there can benefit on a quick explanation of how to speed paint an army. These four models were all done in under two hours combined and I am quite happy with how they turned out.

Onslaught 2011 Army List

2011-09-14T11:19:00.001-06:00

So, we have an upcoming local tournament, Onslaught, and I am completely re-tooling (and painting) my Imperial Guard to participate. I will be getting into what I learned from the Nova Open in some later posts, but suffice it to say that I did not have the tools I required to get the job done. Thus, I am proposing a new list:

Imperial Guard: Shitstorm

CCS w/ 2x Melta, Astropath, Chimera 155
CCS w/ 2x Melta, Chimera 125

5x Stormtroopers w/ 2x Melta, Chimera 160
5x Stormtroopers w/ 2x Melta, Chimera 160

Infantry Platoon 410
PCS w/ 3x Melta, Chimera
Infantry Squad w/ Melta, Chimera
Infantry Squad w/ Melta, Chimera
SWS w/ 3x Melta

Infantry Platoon 410
PCS w/ 3x Melta, Chimera
Infantry Squad w/ Melta, Chimera
Infantry Squad w/ Melta, Chimera
SWS w/ 3x Melta

Veterans w/ 3x Melta, Shotguns, Chimera 155
Veterans w/ 3x Melta, Shotguns, Chimera 155

Armoured Sentinel w/ Autocannon 60
Armoured Sentinel w/ Autocannon 60

Hydra Flak Cannon w/ Heavy Bolter 75
Hydra Flak Cannon w/ Heavy Bolter 75

Total: 2000

Why 'Shitstorm'? Because when you look at this pile of garbage units (which actually are not really that bad) your first impression is that it is a pile of shit, but I can assure you that I will force you to weather their storm. Also: Jim Lahey's Shit Talk

Basic Analysis
What this list does is take advantage of three potent strategies that force-multiply the list:

Load up on AV12 Hulls: These are much harder to deal with than Space Marine Transports, leaving most armies without a ready answer for 16 vehicles.
Maximize the use of Orders: People ignore this mechanic a lot, but there is no downside whatsoever, and as such you should be using this at all times to maximize your effectiveness.
Functional Redundancy: Kill one thing in my army, of your choice, and this thing is still nearly as effective as before you took it. Can Landraiders say that?

Deployment
There would be very few cases where I do not deploy everything on the table, as it is extremely robust. Very simply though, the Hydras each deploy in a corner and the tanks group up to provide mutual cover as much as possible, leaving the more important units in the rear (CCS, Veterans). Generally, the Stormtroopers will use their Deep Strike mission and their chimera will become available for the SWS to get in.

The large number of units actually allow me some additional flexibility. Sure, I can castle up in the centre six-wide, but against an opponent with a heavy outflank component I can simply deploy six to each side, and within two turns cover the entire side edges (instantly destroying any units that must enter).

Tactics
The Chimera blocks group up in sixes and simply move up. As things get destroyed, I can swap more important units into a transport that's still functional. When I lose a transport, that is a good time to drop an Infantry Squad back to sit on a rear objective. Other units can keep up with the Chimeras using the Run! Run! Run! order. The Get Back In The Fight! order ensures you must destroy the squads completely to stop their game effects. So long as I am using six orders per turn, things will go well.

Discussion
What do you think of the list? Can you envision how it plays? Can you see how strong an army like this would be in a competitive setting? Is this thing an abject failure from a fluff point of view? Comment away!